Dear my younger self...
Take heed.
My advice to you is be a Grandparent and NEVER the grandchildren’s surrogate parent even when asked by the mother or father. Your own children will never thank you in the end even after years of devotion to the grand kids.
The grand kids can finally end up being used as pawns (as only their own parents can), It is the grand kids and the grand parents who will finally suffer. Grand parents do not have rights over their grand kids. Your own kids have guardianship and all the rights those bestow… whether fair or otherwise.
I am now surrounded by grand parents who are no longer allowed to see their grandkids.
So take my wise advice.
Grandparents are there for special occasions (when it suits the grandparent) to love and spoil the grand kids. Grandparents and parents are of a different generation and never the twain shall meet. Grand children are the most precious beings in grandparents lives. Enjoy them at arms length if the kids parents are still in the picture. You will thank me for this advice when you can still see your grand kids in your rlater years. Happy grand parenting. I await the time when the grand kids are 18 and are allowed to choose to see me again.
Love, Granma
Written to their 46 year old self by Anonymous, Pocklington u3a
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